I don't feel secure at all!

Yesterday I took the day off work to support Mr. Fight as he applied for disability. Oh, yes. A fun day at the Social Security Office was had by all. Yes, the one downtown. To kill time in the waiting room husband was going from person to person and making up reasons why each person was there. The Social Security Office downtown is usually full of some pretty interesting, uh, "characters".

I won't go into detail about what he was saying because it was pretty rude, but there was a Wolf man (think Eddie Munster) and some Mickey Rourke looking guy with a leather jacket with all the fringe and silver circular things hanging from it, so you can use your imagination. It was pretty funny. Before anyone gets upset, let me tell you my husband was looking like no prize. He was in rare form actually. He went bald in high school (yeah but he also had giant mutton chop sideburns in middle school) and he always shaves his head and wears a hat. Always. Even around the house. In his mind, he thought it would be a good idea to make himself look as pathetic as possible for his disability interview. He let his hair grow out for a few weeks and it was all scraggly and he didn't wear a hat. It was full on male pattern baldness on a 26 year old. I've never seen him like that. I mean, I don't give a shit if he's bald or not, but it's funny to see your husband with a "look" you don't know. He also has been growing this crazy beard all winter, which is now like 3 inches off his face and looked really nice with the hairdo. The decision isn't up to the lady who interviewed him, so looking pathetic wouldn't really help or hurt his case I don't think, but it was funny to see him cultivate this "pathetic look".

Anyway, Mr. Fight had to recount every job he has ever had since he was 14 in 1998. The lady was asking him stuff like how much money did he make at each job and what type of hours did he work. He didn't even remember some of the jobs! After that he had to go over all of his health care info like every doctor he's seen since 1998. I can see how people would get discouraged and overwhelmed at all the paperwork and the quantity of information you have to gather. I'm ready though. I am ready to fill out every form they throw at me until my husband has the benefits he needs and deserves. So in 6 months I should have a decision and if he gets denied I have to appeal it and get a court date. I was told that takes up to two years.

I know this will be a long process and I will probably be frustrated and overwhelmed myself, but I feel good that the wheels are in motion. I have a little bit of hope that my husband and I will begin to live a normal life within the next few years. The last six years of my life have been such a roller coaster with him, learning more and more about how sick he really is as it became harder and harder for him to hide it from me. We just want the same kinds of things that other people want; a home, a family and our next meal.