I hope I can finish this post before my brain explodes.

Holy. Shit. Am. I. Pissed.

Now that the divorce-y stuff is getting underway, I told (soon to be ex) Mr. Fight to get his own damn car insurance, cell phone plan, bank account, etc. I mean, I wasn't a dick about it, I was really trying to be as patient and accommodating as possible about the whole thing. I wasn't the one who had to get the new plans, policies, etc., because everything was in my name to begin with, with the exception of the car insurance. The policy we had was mine before we met and then I added him to mine, since he was on his parents (natch). He texted me a week ago maybe and told me he took care of the car insurance. Oh, he took care of it all right.

Well, I've been going through all my online stuff and changing the passwords, not only to keep him from screwing me in whatever way he can think of, but because the password was our wedding day. It was bothering me to have to keep typing it every time I went online. That day was apparently not one of my better days for decision-making. Anyway. So there I was changing my password and I wanted to check how much my car insurance was now that Mr. Fucknut was off of it. Are you ready? HE CANCELLED MY CAR INSURANCE AND LEFT HIMSELF ON MY POLICY. Oh, yes. Instead of getting his own policy with the same or a different company, he just deletes my car off the policy that I've had for over seven years. I've had no car insurance for the last week. Nice. Thank goodness I checked. I mean, the problem was easily solved, I just called up and cancelled his car and put mine back on. I thought about sending him some psycho angry text, but that's not going to be as fun as letting him think he has car insurance when he, in fact, does not. I'm pretty sure he's too stupid to realize he isn't getting a bill. Also, this way I don't have to have any contact with him, which is one of my top priorities.

At first we were trying to be all cool to each other, but as soon as he realized that we were totally, totally over, he stopped being so...cordial. Unfortunately we still have to deal with each other quite a bit, since right now we're not only still technically married, but we had a lot of intertwined shit. Luckily we didn't own anything and I'm willing to keep all the debt so it was only small stakes stuff, like the cell phones, car insurance, etc. I was talking to him a couple weeks ago because he wanted me to give him my engagement ring back (uhh...which I bought myself, but I said fuck it) and he kept asking me if I had a new boyfriend. I told him yes, but didn't give any other details at the time (don't worry you'll hear all about him soon enough) because Mr. Fight is a fucking psycho and I didn't want any stalker shit. I knew he was only asking me because he wanted to tell me all about his new girlfriend. You ready for this one? This totally beats the car insurance, but I've known about it for a few weeks so I'm not pissed. Actually I was never pissed, when he told me about the new girl I couldn't stop grinning. Ok, here it is.

My lowlife future ex-husband is dating a 16 year old!

Ummm...illegal much? (Not that I don't do illegal shit, but I think this rule might be a good one.) Disgusting much? I feel bad for this poor girl. No, I really don't. I should. As a teacher I am appalled, but as a goddamn human I'm appalled too. How skeezy. The reason it made me smile was because it just validated all my feelings about him. He was a fucking loser. Loser. Loser. What a joke. He goes, "All I have to do to keep her happy is buy her a pack of cigarettes once in a while." She sounds perfect for him. Then when he got off the phone he goes, "I've got to go, I've got little girls to fuck." Isn't that sick? And he met her on Myspace. Of course. I think there's a government database that might need his name.

Wow, my brain didn't explode. Right on.